Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Out-of-office

Nilo Yacat is out of office.

Everytime I see my Ateneo friends, they tease me about my out-of-office message. They think that all I do is travel outside Manila. To them, my out-of-office message means “I can’t be reached so don’t bother at all.”

But to me, “out-of-office” simply means it is time to get dirt on my boots. It is time to see what is out there, what is really happening, what is the purpose of all the pencil-pushing and keyboard-ticking that I do when I am “in-office.”

Last week, I went to the province of Sultan Kudarat for my first project monitoring mission this year. It has been a while since my last project visit. Last year, Aires was pregnant and I had to limit my travels to be with her, if possible all of the time.

Together with a new colleague, Nogel, I visited a remote village called Midtungok, almost three hours from the capital city of Isulan. Midtungok is a village of about 1,550 people, mostly Ilonggo-speaking Christians and a few Manobos. The village center is at the foot of rolling hills and mountains. Around 50 other families, mostly Manobos, live on the mountain slopes.

In July last year, a flashflood swept through the village, destroying crops and properties and submerging houses for days.

When we were all getting ready for Christmas last year, the villagers of Midtungok had fled their houses, hiding in the forest or cowering in fear in evacuation centers, after a band of rebel soldiers attacked and ransacked houses.

The rebels strafed houses and fired at the elementary school. One big hole in the wall of a classroom is now covered by a cute flower cut-out colored paper. Medicines and the only blood pressure apparatus were taken from the health center. Cattle and poultry animals were snatched away. For three days, the rebels put the village under siege. When a military strike finally arrived on Christmas day, the rebels had already gone ahead, leaving a note on rice sacks saying: “We will be back.”

How are the villagers now? Many have tried to rebuild what was damaged. But two Manobo families stay at the health center (all 14 of them) because the women are still afraid to go back to the upland. Two of their neighbors (Manobo fathers) were killed during the attack.

How are the children? The grade 6 students are graduating this March. And many of them now want to become policemen, policewomen or soldiers. “To fight the rebels,” they said rather cheerfully.

But the younger ones carry the brunt the worst. I met one family who has a two-year old son named Ronron. Their house was near the riverbed, where the rebels took camp. When they fled, little Ronron saw men in fatigue uniforms barging in houses with high-powered guns. The family stayed overnight hiding in the forest, with just bamboo trees protecting them from the cold and from gunfire.

Today, Ronron clings fearfully to his mother every time he sees a man in fatigue uniform, every time he hears banging sounds.

Then, I learned of the story of a Manobo woman named Langini Gamboa. She gave birth on that fateful Christmas day but died during the siege because of excessive bleeding. Her husband, Efren, could not take her to the nearest health center for no one would look after their children and they could die amidst the gunfire should he take everybody down from the mountain. I wanted to meet Efren and the surviving children but we were not given clearance to go to the periphery of the village. It saddened me that I could not, in my capacity as a development worker, reach out to them.

It breaks my heart, knowing that peace has remained elusive in Mindanao. I tear up because I have spoken to Muslims and Christians in other villages in Mindanao who have learned to live peacefully with each other. All they think each day is how to till the land, and what to feed their children. And yet, we hear of news stories about gunfire and crossfire, of displacement and evacuation, of children missing school and losing their parents.

If peace were an office guy like me, then he has gone out-of-office too long.

Monday, March 9, 2009

Why I forget things

You did not lock the car,... again. You forgot your celfone,... again. You left your wallet,... again.

My wife, Aires, nearly did not marry me because of my forgetfulness. As far as I can remember (pun intended), I have always been forgetful about where I placed an object or what's the name of the person who just greeted me or what I should have done that was so simple that it embarrassed me to death to know that I simply forgot all about it.

I have long accepted that I may just be built this way. But Aires still could not reconcile how a seemingly intelligent creature like me could be so absent-minded.

A few years ago, I tried to improve memory retention. I kept a Nilo shelf where I put all my stuff. I tried posting on the door things that I should bring for the day.

To not lose important objects, I chose not to part ways with them. Take for example my wedding ring. I have not taken off my wedding ring for a number of years now. I am afraid that I may forget where I put it and eventually lose it.

But why do I forget things? My mind works like a comic or film strip. I see flashes of images. Most of these images are "fast-forward", my imagination of what is next for me. When I park the car, my thoughts are not about parking but about taking the elevator and going to my office. When I get off from work, my thoughts are not about taking my lunch bag with me but about taking the elevator and going to the parking. I call this state the Next-Step state. My mind is filled up with images of what will happen next that I fail to focus on what is happening at the now state.

Aires tells me to do a last-minute scan. Before I leave one scene, I spend a moment to scan the setting for things that I may leave behind. Sounds easy... How I wish I can always remember to do this before the fast-forward images flood my mind.

http://www.memory-improvement-tips.com/forgetfulness.html